Monday, July 25, 2022

Chickens

  My phone rang one morning.  I answered it, and the man's voice on the other end told me that today was going to be a happy day.  I thanked him.  He told me that I had won the Publisher's Clearing House sweepstakes.  I asked him how much did I win?  He told me $250 million dollars.  Well, for a half a second, I was surprised, but then I wondered why the guy with balloons wasn't out front.  Don't they surprise you at the door?  I've seen many TV congratulatory commercials, usually around the time of the NBC national news.  This guy was trying to give me a heads up, I guessed.  I asked him about the balloons, and he said he just wanted to make sure I would be home that night.  I told him that I would act surprised.

 Being skeptical, I had to ask him a couple of questions to verify his announcement.  Knowing that PCH was located in NY state, I asked him what his address was.  He gave me an address in NY state.  Okay, then I asked him how the weather was there, and he said it was hot.  They had just gone through a blizzard up there.  Red flag.  

 Back in 1980, I worked for the federal government.  One of my duties was to find people who had not paid their taxes for the last seven years.  My job taught me well.  Not to brag, but I could find just about anyone.  While I was talking to this nice man on the phone, I went to my computer and did a search for the phone he was calling from.  It came back as a foreign number.  Red flag number two.  But, I decided to play along with him.  I asked him if he would call back.  I figured if he thought he had a pigeon on the phone, he would call back.

 Guess what?  He did.  He told me that they weren't going to be able to come by to give me my check for $250 million.  I wasn't surprised.  He asked me if I would be available the next day?  I said yes.  He said that his people were going to go by my bank and deposit the money before coming over to my home.  He wanted me to give him my bank account number over the phone.  Of course, I wasn't going to do that.  I suggested that I meet his people at my bank.  I asked him what time should I meet his people at my bank, and he said around 9:30am.  There was just one problem.  His original call was on a Friday.  I told him that my bank wasn't open on Saturday.  He didn't know that.  Red flag number three.

 I asked to speak to his supervisor, because I thought we were at an impasse.  He told me that his supervisor was not in the office.  That was when I heard a strange sound.  Chickens clucking in the background.  And, other voices sounding like they were calling other "winners".  Red flag number four.  Since when are there other $250 million-dollar winners out there?  And, why do they have chickens clucking in their "office"?  I asked him to please call me back in about an hour.  

 While I was waiting for him to call back, I contacted PCH.  They said my call was a scam.  I then contacted the Federal Trade Commission and told them about these scammers.  I gave them the number of these guys who raise chickens.  When the guy called back, I told him that I had checked with his company, and they told me that his call was a scam.  I also told him that I had contacted the FEDS.  He got very belligerent and started cursing me.  He then said that there was a guy out front of my house with a shotgun, and he was going to kill me.  I told him that I don't live in a house.  I live in an apartment.  I looked outside, and no one was there.  He hung up on me.  I called the Sheriff's Department to report a murder threat over the phone.  They sent a car out just to make sure there wasn't someone across the street with a shotgun.  I filled out a report just in case, but I found that this guy was calling from Jamaica.  I just hope their chickens laid some eggs for breakfast the next morning.  


No comments:

Post a Comment